When your classic “Freaky Friday” story and slasher/horror flick have a baby, you get Freaky movie, now available on-demand. We were intrigued by the trailer when we saw a body-swap movie with a teenage girl switching bodies with a relentless serial killer.
Freaky Movie Review
While incredibly gory (thus the slasher/horror component), Freaky movie is rife with one-liners, physical comedy, and heart. All four of my teens were glued to the screener and were so excited at the chance to watch this film!
With great one-liners, heart, and loads of gore, you know you’re bound to get some great quotes. Add Vince Vaughn, Kathryn Newton, Celeste O’Connor, Misha Osherovich, Uriah Shelton, Dana Drori, Katie Finneran, and Alan Ruck and it’s the perfect recipe for their disaster and our delight.
We’ve collected the Freaky movie best quotes for you.
Kathryn Newton as The Butcher in Millie Kessler’s body in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
Best Quotes from Freaky Movie
He moves through this town unseen, like a ghost. And he kills at will, every year. The Blissfield Butcher started his reign of terror in 1977, and it continues to this day. –Evan
A geriatric serial killer? Really? –Isaac
Don’t underestimate a straight white man’s propensity for violence, Isaac. I don’t care how f***ing old they are. And your story, it’s bulls**t, Evan. –Ginny
All the Blissfield Butcher stories are centered around homecoming, and a new legend pops up every year during homecoming week to warn Blissfield’s teenagers of the dangers of ‘underage debauchery’. –Ginny
You’re taking too long. It’s a vagina, not an all-night drive-through. –Ginny
She has a date with me. We’re going to see Wicked at the Anus Theater. –Coral
Your night is still ending in tragedy. –Char
I love your black wiener Mr. Daniels. –Josh
Your mom’s superpower is guilt. –Josh
(from left) Millie Kessler (Kathryn Newton), Nyla Chones (Celeste O’Connor) and Josh Detmer (Misha Osherovich) in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
I’m in it for the drunk straight boys who will suddenly realize they’re fluid. –Josh
That sounds kind of rapey. –Nyla
Good. Have you seen what’s on the menu in this town? –Josh
Booker is going to be at the dance. This is your chance to land that plane. –Josh
I’m not landing that plane or any plane. He hardly knows I exist. –Millie
Are you serious? You’re a f***ing piece, girl. –Josh
See, even the word police agrees –Josh
I just, I don’t want you to wake up one morning and realize your whole life passed you by because you were busy being everything to everyone but you. –Nyla
You can’t keep living your life for someone else. You gotta do what’s good for you. –Josh
I love your dress. I think I saw it at Discount Bonanza. Did your mom get an employee discount? –Ryler
Hey. Pro-tip. Always set your watch five minutes ahead. It saves my ass like every time. –Booker
Vince Vaughn as The Butcher in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
He’s just an urban legend. He’s not real. –Nyla
Four very dead teens, it seems pretty real to me.–Josh
Do you want us to wait with you? There is a psycho roaming free. –Josh
Where am I? Oh, my God. Why do I sound like that? –Millie as The Blissfield Butcher
What the f*ck? Oh, Jesus. Okay. You are just hallucinating. –Millie/Butcher
I smell like hotdog water. –Millie/Butcher
I’m just curious. What do I look like? Like when you’re seeing me right now? Do I look like a, you know, do I look like a girl? –Millie/Butcher
Girl? –Cooter Scriggins
Yeah. You know like 5-foot-5, very petite blond. –Millie/Butcher
You’re f***ing lying, man. You got drugs. You’re high right now. –Cooter Scriggins
Oh, my God it’s a slaughterhouse –Josh
Love you, poodle. –Josh
And that police sketch, of course, that guy’s a killer. That gross, bloated, sweaty face, and brown teeth. I mean, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone as hideous as that. –Ryler
Oh, my God. Something else happened last night, didn’t it? You can totally tell me. I’m like the most trustworthy person. –Ryler
(from left) Nyla Chones (Celeste O’Connor), Millie Kessler in The Butcher’s body (Vince Vaughn) and Josh Detmer (Misha Osherovich) in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
I’m a giant. –Millie/Butcher
I’m missing AP Bio, I didn’t come here to clam jam with you. I’ve had like ten kombuchas today, so I’m going to go pee. And when I get back, you’re either spilling the tea, or I’m out. –Ryler
Are you sure this is safe? –Ryler
No. –Millie/Butcher
Guys. Guys! Guys, guys, listen. It’s not what you think. –Millie/Butcher
Balls. I got balls. –Millie/Butcher
Kathryn Newton as The Butcher in Millie Kessler’s body in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
You’re black! I’m gay! We are so dead! –Josh
Stop running. I’m not going to hurt you. It’s me. It’s Millie. –Millie/Butcher
Okay. Back up. Back up! Guys, listen to me. I am not trying to hurt you, okay? If I was, would I drop my weapon? I’m your friend. –Millie/Butcher
Everyone’s tired. We’ve done lots of hitting. It’s time to talk. –Millie/Butcher
Hail, hail, Blissfield High. Chomp, chomp, chomp’s our battle cry. When our Beavers come to fight, feel our glory, and our might. Yeah? –Millie/Butcher
Standing and peeing is kind of rad! –Millie/Butcher
This is like 3 gallons of pee. This guy’s bladder is huge. –Millie/Butcher
Do I wipe? –Millie/Butcher
You’ve got to see this it’s like a floppy anteater! –Millie/Butcher
She’s got a d*ck in her hand and you are wearing Chanel number 5. I think we are past that. –Nyla
Oh, my God. Are you serious? I’m not a c*ck gobbler. –Millie/Butcher
It’s doable. Adjacent. –Josh
(from left) Millie Kessler in The Butcher’s body (Vince Vaughn) and Booker Strode (Uriah Shelton) in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
Guys, he’s here somewhere. And he’s wearing my body, and he’s wearing my face. He’s like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. And if we don’t capture him first, God knows how many people he’s going to kill. –Millie/Butcher
I’m dyslexic! I have a doctor’s note. –Josh
(from left) Tim Turnipseed (Zack Shires) and Millie Kessler in The Butcher’s body (Vince Vaughn) in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
Oh my God, did you just pee yourself? –Millie/Butcher
He’s even gorgeous when he’s unconscious. –Millie/Butcher
Look, I know I look like the Butcher. But it’s Millie. This is going to sound really strange. –Millie/Butcher
Have you ever seen me dress like that? I mean, I do kind of like what he’s doing with it. –Millie/Butcher
(from left) Josh Detmer (Misha Osherovich), Ryler (Melissa Collazo), The Butcher in Millie Kessler’s body (Kathryn Newton) and Nyla Chones (Celeste O’Connor) in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
Definitely going to die this time. –Josh
Great. Leave me alone with murder Barbie. –Josh
I’ve never been so stress and excited in my entire life. –Millie/Butcher
I felt oddly empowered being in this body. Like invincible, or kind of badass…I guess when you’re someone like me, and, you know, you’ve been bullied most of your life, and, you know, sort of just put down a lot, that, you know, it does feel kind of good to just feel strong for once. –Millie/Butcher
Strength doesn’t come from size. It comes from up here. And in there. And you are a lot stronger than you think. –Booker
Honey, why is Millie tied to my dining chair? –Mrs. Detmer
Joshua, you are many things, but straight is not one of them. –Mrs. Detmer
I’ve been slinging peanuts to a*sholes all week. I don’t have time for this. –Mrs. Detmer
How weird is it that I kind of feel like kissing you right now? –Booker
Technically, you’d be kissing a mass murderer with yellow teeth. –Millie/Butcher
Maybe we should wait for when my hand’s not bigger than your whole face. –Millie/Butcher
That’s okay. It’s whenever you want. I’m not going anywhere. –Booker
I really thought your hamster could swim, and I’m so sorry that Regal died. But this is all going to make sense to you later on. I got to run. I’m so sorry. I love you! –Millie/Butcher
Time to stab this a**hole. –Millie/Butcher
Come back with my f*cking body! –Millie/Butcher
Vince Vaughn as The Butcher in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
Stop, I’m trying to stab myself! –Millie/Butcher
I can’t wait to kill you. –The Blissfield Butcher as Millie
Kathryn Newton as The Butcher in Millie Kessler’s body in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
Are you good at math Millie? Cause the way I see it, you have three holes and it all adds up. –Football player
Time to land that plane, girl. –Josh
(from left) The Butcher (Vince Vaughn) and Millie Kessler (Kathryn Newton) in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
What’s the matter, Millie? You got what you wanted, right? You got your body back. Why aren’t you happy? –The Blissfield Butcher
Little girls shouldn’t play with guns. –The Blissfield Butcher
Having balls sucks. –Millie
(from left) The Butcher (Vince Vaughn) and Millie Kessler (Kathryn Newton) in Freaky, co-written and directed by Christopher Landon.
I’m a f*cking piece. –Millie
Did we get your favorite Freaky quote? Let me know in the comments what your favorite Freaky quote is!
Check out Spontaneous Movie Review | Best Quotes from Love and Monsters
About Freaky Movie
Seventeen-year-old Millie Kessler (Kathryn Newton, Blockers, HBO’s Big Little Lies) is just trying to survive the bloodthirsty halls of Blissfield High and the cruelty of the popular crowd. But when she becomes the newest target of The Butcher (Vince Vaughn), her town’s infamous serial killer, her senior year becomes the least of her worries.
When The Butcher’s mystical ancient dagger causes him and Millie to wake up in each other’s bodies, Millie learns that she has just 24 hours to get her body back before the switch becomes permanent and she’s trapped in the form of a middle-aged maniac forever. The only problem is she now looks like a towering psychopath who’s the target of a city-wide manhunt while The Butcher looks like her and has brought his appetite for carnage to Homecoming.
With some help from her friends—ultra-woke Nyla (Celeste O’Connor, Ghostbusters: Afterlife), ultra-fabulous Joshua (Misha Osherovich, The Goldfinch), and her crush Booker (Uriah Shelton, Enter the Warriors Gate)—Millie races against the clock to reverse the curse while The Butcher discovers that having a female teen body is the perfect cover for a little Homecoming killing spree.
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