If you've ever ridden the Jungle Cruise attraction at Disneyland or Walt Disney World, you know the Jungle Cruise Skippers tell a bunch of corny jokes loaded with puns. After all, that's what the ride is all about. You can't visit Disney Parks without a stop to see the 8th Wonder of the World: the Backside of Water! Disney's Jungle Cruise movie included many of those punny jokes and includes many other funny Jungle Cruise quotes. We wanted to share a collection of best Jungle Cruise movie quotes and best Jungle Cruise puns.
Photo: Disney
Spoilers ahead if you have yet to see Disney's Jungle Cruise movie. Here's a collection of the best Jungle Cruise movie quotes.
Best Jungle Cruise Movie Quotes
First of all, let me congratulate you on your excellent choice of Skipper. Of all the Jungle Cruises, this is undoubtedly the cheapest. –Skipper Frank
Mommy, can you please make him stop. –Little Girl
Ladies and gentlemen, get ready for the 8th wonder of the world, wait for it…the backside of water. –Frank
I get paid by the number of people I take out, not by the number I bring back. –Frank
You are deeply unpleasant and off-key. –Lily
Is there a single thing I can trust about you? –Lily
Not a thing.–Frank
She stood by me and for that, I’d follow her into a volcano. –McGregor
Remember it’s only a scam if you fall for it. –Frank
Where were we? –Frank
About to die. –Passenger
Who brings a submarine to the Amazon? –Frank
Well folks you were all outstanding today.
Now I need you all out, standing on the dock.
That means get off my boat.
(Laughs) I’m only serious. –Frank
Ma'am, don’t forget to collect your baggage. I’m only kidding, he’s behind you. –Frank
Frank owes me money. – Rosita
Dead I’d have to carry you. Dead’s a lot harder lady.–Frank
Best rates in town, completely Jaguar free.–Frank
The liquor. –McGregor
That one can stay.–Frank
Gosh there’s a lot of you. –McGregor
Yes there is. –Frank
Sorry Frank. –Lily
Thanks alright strong form. –Frank
Go ahead and use the soap to wash yourself ashore. –Frank
Is there a single thing about you I can trust? –Lily
Not a thing. –Frank
Emily Blunt as Lily Houghton and Dwayne Johnson as Frank Wolff in Disney’s JUNGLE CRUISE. Photo courtesy of Disney. © 2021 Disney Enterprises, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Best Jungle Cruise Puns
I had a girlfriend once. She was cross-eyed. It didn’t work out. We could never see eye-to-eye. –Frank
I’m also quite sure she was seeing somebody on the side. –Frank
The boa constrictor right can eat up to 500 lbs per sitting. Personally, I find that very hard to swallow. –Frank
The rocks you see here in the river are sandstone, but some people just take them for granite. It’s one of my boulder attractions. –Frank
You know, before this I worked in an orange juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn’t concentrate. Yeah, they put the squeeze on me. –Frank
If you look to the left of the boat you’ll see some very playful toucans playing their favorite game of beak wrestling. The only drawback is only two can play. –Frank
We’re heading into headhunter territory, which is a terrible place to be. Headed. –Frank
You are absolutely… ex-austing .–Lily
Photo: Disney
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MEET THE CAST OF JUNGLE CRUISE
JUNGLE CRUISE FLOATS INTO THEATERS AND TO DISNEY+ PREMIER ACCESS ON JULY 30. IT IS RATED PG-13 (FOR ADVENTURE VIOLENCE) AND HAS A RUNTIME OF 2 HOURS AND 7 MINUTES.
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